All Eyes Watching YOU!

Have you felt the world revolves around you?

’Vaikaal’ which in Tamil means a small valley kind of structure through which water flows in the field and also the open drainage. For me, as a child, Vaikaal meant sleeping between my Mom and Dad. A valley between the two people who loved and cared for the most. That was one of the best feelings I ever had. Bundled in love and warmth of my parents. I felt loved and it felt safe.

Growing up in school or in college I always liked sitting in the centre or in the middle of a bunch of friends. I always loved to be in the centre not for the attention but to feel safe and warm.

When the physical distance from people set in as I grew, I still wanted to be in the centre but now for attention. At least I did the right things to grab the attention of people in the family and with friends and so in business. When I became the face of Tupperware ’She can You can’ or when I was awarded ’Power women’. It felt immensely good. I was in the centre of attention.

With being in the centre I also felt that the world revolved around me. I am sure most of us would have felt the same sometimes or always. I felt like the main character in the plot I was playing in life, so like you too. Any meeting or social events I attended I thought the whole eyes were on me. So I always put my best face forward. Just like how you keep smiling on your wedding day, on that stage, not recognising most of the people but yet you keep smiling and end with a pain in the cheek. That’s what I kept doing for many many years.

I felt people were watching me all the time. I even had times when if I had to take a rest in between business, I felt like my boss watching me from thin air. That was so true and that helped me become a performer and an achiever.

What I missed in all the growth was just this tiny realisation that I have now. The realisation that no one is watching me or the least thinking about me. I just had all these thoughts only because I wasn’t looking at me inside. I was all the time looking outside of me. I so wish I knew this early on. But wait realisation grows in like a seed. I can’t expect the fruit the next day I sow it.

The new centre that I have got a glimpse of is limitless, unlike the external growth and achievement I have been embarking that looked limitless but always had a ceiling to it. The changeset in when I let myself fall when I let my ego crash when I Started Meditating.

I am now just stardust, but worth every bit. I am limitless and so are you.

Continue Reading

• Have You Ever Judged Someone? — The train starts to leave the station. Travelling alone, I just wanted to have my dinner and settle with my book in the upper berth, so that I have enough...
• Transcendence — Change Makes You Wholesome!